From gollingj@keystone.westminster.edu Tue Oct 28 15:12:08 1997 Date: Tue, 28 Oct 1997 14:59:23 -0500 From: "G. Gollinger" To: gollingj@keystone.westminster.edu Subject: [Fwd: joke] [ Part 1: "Included Message" ] Xref: pilchuck alt.tasteless.jokes:110621 Path: pilchuck!entropy1!nwnews.wa.com!ixa.net!iagnet.net!newsfeed.internetmci.com!206.154.70.8!news.webspan.net!usenet From: Newsgroups: alt.tasteless.jokes Subject: joke Date: 25 Oct 1997 14:14:13 GMT Organization: WebSpan Inc., New Jersey Message-ID: <01bce150$504ba7e0$055a9ace@Pcharlesg> NNTP-Posting-Host: usr1-00.mon.ny.webspan.net X-Report-Abuse-To: abuse@mail.webspan.net NNTP-Posting-Date: 25 Oct 1997 10:14:15 EDT X-Newsreader: Microsoft Internet News 4.70.1161 The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school (read Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.) Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can't see my license plate. Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do." Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car? A: Always wear a condom. Q: When driving through fog, what should you use? A: Your car. Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident? A: Be too ****-faced to find your keys. Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving? A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster. Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully? A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully. Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed? A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute. Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? A: The color. Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic? A: Heavy psychedelics. Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons. -- charlesg@webspan.net (CHAZ)