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Newsgroups: alt.tasteless.jokes,alt.drunken.bastards,talk.bizarre
Subject: man CHOAD
From: +++@fubar.net (Y. Murg)
Date: Sun, 11 May 1997 07:47:48 -0700 (PDT)


CHOAD(1)              UNIX Programmer's Manual               CHOAD(1)

NAME
     choad

SYNOPSIS
     choad [-wrcj] [-lph] [-e] femfile, malefile, pedophile
                                (rare- animalphile)
                (set $testes $bladder prior to usage)

DESCRIPTION

        choad originally designed as utility tool, now often used for
        recreational purposes. By default it is it -h mode. When an
        argument is encountered it will occasionally enter -w mode.
        When several arguments are given it has been known to go to
        the corner bar. Contents must be monitored closely, default
        output from `$bladder', though can be switched to `$testes'.

        Options;


        -w      wood, used for probings
        -r      forcible -w mode, frowned upon
        -c      consensual mode, needs symbolic link (produces best results)
        -s      sacked anti-virus mode. (suggested made default-mode
                via .alias)
        -l      limp mode, rarely invoked can result from too many arguments
        -p      act as pipe for $bladder
        -j      act as pipe for $testes
        -h      default wait mode
        -e      archaic `cut' guard/choir mode

        NOTE: not all options are compatible

OUTPUT
        by default $bladder; optional $testes

INPUT
        Rare, can cause damage

SEE ALSO
        fsck    alt.tasteless   cooter


BUGS
        susceptible to virus use -s option religiously.
        wildly exaggerated size/usage reports make it difficult to
        document, especially since the hacking of choad kernel is easy &
        viewed by some as rite of passage, so many variants abound

        The input device is assumed to be stretchable.