1. COVER YOUR STUMP BEFORE YOU HUMP
     2. BEFORE YOU ATTACK HER...COVER YOUR WACKER
     3. DON'T BE SILLY...PROTECT YOUR WILLIE
     4. BEFORE YOU BLAST HER...GUARD YOUR BUSHMASTER
     5. DON'T BE A LONER...COVER YOUR BONER
     6. WHEN IN DOUBT...SHROUD YOUR SPOUT
     7. YOU CAN'T GO WRONG IF YOU SHIELD YOUR DONG
     8. IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SACK IT, GO HOME AND WHACK IT
     9. IF YOU THINK SHE'S SPUNKY, COVER YOUR MONKEY
    10. BEFORE YOU BAG HER...SHEATH YOUR DAGGER
    11. IT'LL BE SWEETER IF COVER YOUR PETER
    12. IF YOU SLIP BETWEEN THIGHS...BE SURE TO CONDOMIZE
    13. TO SAVE EMBARASSMENT LATER...COVER YOUR GATOR
    14. SHE WON'T GET SICK IF YOU CAP YOUR DICK
    15. IF YOU GO INTO HEAT...PACKAGE YOUR MEAT
    16. WHILE YOU'RE UNDRESSING VENUS...DRESSUP THAT PENIS
    17. WHEN YOU TAKE OFF HER SHIRT AND BLOUSE...SUIT UP THAT TROUSER MOUSE
    18. NEVER DECKER WITH AN UNWRAPPED PECKER
    19. ESPECIALLY IN DECEMBER...GIFT WRAP YOUR MEMBER
    20. BEFO' DA VAN START ROCKIN'...BE SHO YO' COCK GOTS STOCKIN'
    21. DON'T BE A FOOL...VULCANIZE YOUR TOOL
    22. THE RIGHT SELECTION?...SACK THAT ERECTION
    23. WRAP IT IN FOIL BEFORE CHECKING HER OIL
    24. A CRANK WITH ARMOR WILL NEVER HARM HER
    25. REMEMBER ALWAYS: NO GLOVE...NO LOVE
    26. BEFORE YOU DO SOME STICKEN...BE SURE TO BAG YOUR CHICKEN
    27. BEFORE YOU BLOW YOUR BLOB...RUBBERIZE YOUR KNOB
    28. THE ONLY TIME TO BARE IT...IS WHEN YOU CUFF YOUR CARROT
    29. DON'T MAKE HER A MOMMY...ENCASE YOUR SALAMI
    30. DON'T BE A DORK...PROPHYLACTIC YOUR CORK
    31. GOING TO HER TEEPEE?...PUT A COVER ON YOUR PEEPEE
    32. COVER YOUR BIT...DON'T CATCH THAT NASTY SHIT
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