From tiekbane@soltec.netThu May 8 21:09:39 1997 Date: Wed, 23 Apr 1997 03:37:20 GMT From: ÇîļÑ絤ܳ Newsgroups: alt.tasteless Subject: Letter From Management Here's something that's been hanging in our shop for years. Hope ya like it. =========================================================================== From: The Management It has been brought to the attention of management that there has been excessive use of foul and abusive language in the exchange of normal verbal intercourse with relation to routine activities performed on this project. In order to alleviate this horrendous situation and at the same time not interfere with individual freedom and originality lest our fellow workers become frustrated, the following code numbers shall henceforth be uttered in lieu of the phrases listed beside each number: 101 - You’ve got to be shitting me. 102 - Get off my fucking back. 103 - Beats the shit out of me. 104 - What the fuck. 105- It's so fucking bad I can’t believe it. 106- I hate this fucking place. 107- This place sucks. 108- Fuck you very much. 109- Lovely, simply-fucking lovely. 110- That Goddamn Club. 111- Beautiful, just fucking beautiful. 112-Fuck this place. 113- Hair pie, fur burgers. 114- I just got fucked. 115- Big fucking deal. 116- Hang it in your fucking ear. 117- Get bent. 118- I don't give a shit. 119- You've got fucking balls. 120- Merry fucking Christmas. 121- Fuck it, just fuck It. 122- Hot shit. 123- Bitching. 124- Tell someone who gives a shit. 125- Don't get fucking smart. 126- Pardon me sir, you obviously mistook me for someone who really gives a shit. 127- I didn't design the fucking thing, I just installed the motherfucker. 128- Your ass sucks wind. 129- It won’t fucking work. 130- Go pound sand in your ass. 131- Fuck off. 132- Who called this fucking meeting anyhow? 133- You are fucked up beyond all repair. 134- Where in the fuck is my ( )? 135- Your ass is leaking air. 136- Get fucked. 137- Go fuck yourself. 138- What in the fuck is that? ========================================================================== Here are some more that people in the repair biz esp. Ted Rosen might find relevant. If you're not in the industry, ya might wanna go to the next article. Most would be directed at customers: 139- No, I ain't gonna tell ya what's wrong with it, it's a fuckin' secret. 140- Don't give me the goddamn life history of the thing, just tell me what's wrong with it, motherfucker. 141- Don't fucking tell me it didn't do that before...it HAD to do that before. 142- The fucking warranty is not for 8 months. 143- I am not gonna use the side door, I'm gonna use the front door! 144- You see, sir, the problem with your VCR is that IT'S FULL OF COCKROACHES! 145- They better have that fucking car outa the driveway! 146- Look, wo/man, lock the (dog/kid) in a room because if it gets in my way as I carry this thing out, I'm just gonna step on it! 147- When's the last time you cleaned back here, 1953? 148- Theres' a dead ( ) under yer TV. 149- Look gramps, point the remote at the TV, not the kitchen. 150- I cannot/willnot tell ya what's wrong with it if you describe the prollem so I don't know if it's worth fixing or how much it's gonna be and they sure as green shit don't pay me enough to care if it's the only TV you have! 151- I'm not gonna "just check it out." I'm gonna fix the fuckin' thing! 152- No, I haven't had a chance to "just look at it", I got better things to do. 153- If dicks like you would stop calling to see if your ( ) is done, it would be done. 154- I understood that, sir, the fuckin' first ten times you told me. 155- Wipe the snotlett off your nose, gramps. Retailing would be great if it weren't for the customers bothering me all the time. Tiek Bane I voted for my politicians. They murdered somebody with lethal injection, there fore I am a murderer also.